Kejohanan Sukan Futsal & Bola Jaring IPTA-IPTS Pulau Pinang

Everybody was on a buoyant mood that day. It was a Saturday morning. One of the few weekend morning where we dont really mind waking up early from. Because we have footy to play that day. hehe. Paan, Nizam and me arrived early with Sir Zabidi. We had our breakfast some where near Poli and waited for the others. Mr Wan our HEP was already there. After a while the boys and the girls arrived.

The boys are sleepy and yawning as usual, while the girls as usual, are chatty. I called upon the futsal team for our last tactical meeting. But later, rain started pouring like cats and dogs. The girls carried on with their netball tournament, because playing netball in the rain appears to not bring up any safety issue, unlike futsal. So futsal was postponed to the next day. Our strength that day was spent cheering on the netball team. Not that we wanted to since we don't really understand netball and their positional issue: GA dgn GS ja boleh masuk D, bila defend tak boleh steal the ball etc. (tak mencabar langsung game ni hehe).

But since they needed all the support we could give, we became the pompom boys. But hey we were really effective though. Because we don't just support, we intimidate the opposition. You know la how girls are vulnerable to verbal attacks. So from outside the court if we see any opening or 'lubuk', we'd start trashtalking. We're mean I tell you. But somebody's gotta take one for the team am I right? It was worth it though. The girls managed to get into the quarter final the next day against usm. By noon we were already back home in Penang.

The next day, as usual we went to poli, again. We tried to maintain the same momentum we had from the day before but as soon as we started warming up, it rained. Again, we have to wait for the organizer to decide whether to continue or postpone the tournament. Thank God the rain stopped after the girls finished their match. They lost to usm by a big margin. Too much respect I supposed, since the big sis has been training them. To be continued.. mls gila hari ni.

Non-believer

Anywhere you are, I am near
Anywhere you go, I'll be there
Anytime you whisper my name, you'll see
How every single promise I keep
Cuz what kind of guy would I be
If I was to leave when you need me most

based on a true story, or so they say.

song says it all, but we'll see..

twenty ringgit says not for long..

any takers?

Semboyan telah berbunyi..

Say hello to the captain of ICT futsal team. tehee.

#5: Fav number. Always. Since 03

Today Cik Jimmy did his final selection for the team. Seven creme de la creme was chosen and I'm given the captain's armband. Well here's the line up for tomorrow's contigent:

Manager: Wan Zabidi

Coach: Norulazmi (Jimmy)

Team official: Ari

Players: Ridzal

Nizam

Farhan

Pali (GK)

Hadi

Azmil (C)

Dowfy

Well done lads. You guys deserved it. For those who didn't make the cut, there's always other tournament in the future. I felt bad at first. It feels as if that I've stolen a spot in the team. I mean, it wasn't my intention to get selected at the first place. I'm no longer an ICT student. When I participated during the selection tournament last week pun, Naqi and Shah vouched for me to the HEP and Sir Jimmy.

Full kit: The legendary orange jersey

But still, we received our chances equally. Even yang tak terpilih pun masa tournament last week can come for training to try their luck. There's no special treatment towards anybody. Like everybody else, I worked my ass off. Day in day out. Selamba ja sliding tackle atas simen. But it was worth every bruises, cuts and wounds to hear that I am chosen to wear that orange jersey tomorrow.

The windbreaker, with trousers

And oh..today I was invited to this talk show organised by Komed in conjunction of the ICT Curriculum Day. They wanted me to talk about my achievement and maybe try to inspire others. It went well, I supposed. But more about that later. I thought my sabbatical would take longer, given my emotional turmoil and all. But this week has been quite a turning point for me. With futsal, Macam-Macam Komed and other things, I realized that there's more to life than this.

Back in the old days, ICT was a feared futsal team. Sebut ja KTP, orang nanti kia. Seriously. Our seniors had left a legacy. They have gone places and we hope that we can emulate those success too, now that the team is back again after so long. Anyway, better get some sleep. Big day tomorrow. Come support us if you're free. Kami lawan kat Politeknik Seberang Perai esok. Wish us luck.

Her best days will be some of my worst

We emerged as the second runner up in yesterday's futsal tourney. It was my first major honor, one to be remembered. Thanks to Pali, Ari, Dowfy, Syahir and Yon for all your hard work. We fought like a warrior, but yet we still maintained our sportsmanship. Considering that this is a newly assembled team, we did quite well. To put the icing on the cake, 4 out of 6 players from our team were selected to represent the college in the upcoming futsal tournament next week. Me included, but I'm not very sure if I can make it with my injuries and all.

I feel 'alive' for as long as I was on the pitch. Football really is the best medicine. But later, as soon as futsal finished, I'm back to my usual self. Miserable and crestfallen. I'm a bloody hypocrite. Acted cool and whatnot but in truth it is the opposite. Look at you go Azmil, lying to yourself over and over again.

-Instead asking for a helping hand, I pushed people away.

-Instead of accepting things, I wanted to fix things.

-Instead of blaming myself, I blame others.

-Instead of accepting, I kept on denying.

-I claimed that I don't have baggage, but truth be it; I'm damaged.

-I claimed that I live in the present, but I'm still stuck in the past.

-I claimed that I know everything, but all I can see is shades of gray.

-To me everything is about maths equation, prioritizing extrinsic value rather than intrinsic value.

Will be on sabbatical for a while after this. Don't know when I'll be back, but when everything is sorted out I'll write again. Too much emo post lately, which I dont think is appropriate for the public to see. So see you when I see you. It took me ages to love. It's gonna take me ages to un-love.

As if there is such thing. pfftt

damn.

Losing Faith

Taken from Season 6 Episode 20. The scene where House met his therapist Dr. Nolan for their weekly appointment.

Nolan: Something about relationships made you go out and provoke a fight. Wilson and Sam have a relationship. You're not thrilled about it..

House: They're happy. Why should I screw that up. Everyone's happy. Everyone's moving in together. Wilson and Sam, Cuddy and Lucas. Even Alvie's...

Nolan: Cuddy and Lucas are moving in together? You didn't mention that.

House: They talked about moving in together before. It's no big news.

Nolan: Cuddy..(suddenly remembers somethings and went to his laptop) Cuddy.. 'Approach To The Acute Abdoment'. Written by Ernest T. Cuddy, MD. Any relation to your Cuddy?

House: Her great gradfather. I've had it for years. Always meant to give it to her for a special occasion.

Nolan: Like...her house warming?

House: It's just a gift..(annoyed)

Nolan: A woman you care about is taking one step further away from you and closer to someone else? I-I think I can safely say yes, it's significant if you don't mention it. You were willing to punish the husband of your patient because you identified with him. He was also losing someone he loved.

House: I'm not gonna go out and get hammered because a woman I'm not even with, is moving with someone. That'd be pathetic. To hell with this.... When I first came to you I told you that I wanted to be happy. And I followed your advise. And instead, I'm just miserable. How is this working for me?

Nolan: It takes time.

House: For a year, I've done everything you asked, and everybody else is happy. I run on my treadmill. You just sit there and watch. You're a faith healer. You take advantage of people who want to believe. But there's nothing in your bag of tricks.

Self destruct

You lost big money in your investment. She broke up with you. You have daddy issue. You failed in your exams. Your parents getting a divorce. Big deal. You either move on, or you can choose the more popular way to deal with problems: to self destruct. Well here's the top 8 self destruct behavior you can choose from, who knows you'd be able to fix things by getting sympathy..

1. Gluttony

Makan banyak. Minum banyak. Yeah sure it takes the problem off your mind but look forward to those days you'd be injecting insuline and the day you'd realized that your shirts 'shrunk'.

2. Adrenaline

Bawak motor. Koyak minyak sampai abes. Pi jelutong expressway. Cari roadblock. Tunjuk middle finger dekat polis. Lari dari polis. Even if you managed to outrun them,go turn yourself in. Camna orang nak simpati kalau tak kena tangkap, kan?

3. Poison.

Isap rokok, drink alcohol, ambik ubat goyang, hidu gam dan sewaktu dengannya. Nothing can compare to the euphoric effect you're experiencing. But later after that, kantoikan diri anda. Tak macho dan tak dikasihanilah kalau tak kantoi betui dak? buat-buat la tertelefon ex-gf anda ketika anda tengah goyang, atau memandulah dengan berbahaya di depan balai ketika anda mabuk.

4. The jiwang factor.

Hari tiba-tiba hujan. Keluaq umah dan berjalan di dalam hujan selama setengah jam. Bayangkan seolah-olah ada lagu sedih sebagai background music anda. Tapi jangan buat dalam masa dua tiga hari ini. Takut hujan radioaktif disebabkan reaktor nuklear di Jepun meletup baru-baru ni. To be safe, shower dekat rumah would be a great substitute.

5. The Lust derivation.

Pi rumah urut. Or pergi Love Lane. From just 30-50 ringgit, you'd get them to do whatever you want. Kinky or non kinky. Sexual or non sexual. Heck you can also ask them to say 'I love you', something that you've been wanting to hear from your ex.

6. The quit displacement.

Jika and bekerja, jangan pergi kerja sampai boss anda telefon anda dan menjerit 'you're fired' ala-ala Donald Trump. Jika anda masih belajar, jangan pergi kelas sampai lecturer anda barred anda dari ambik exam. Bila kawan anda cuba menasihati anda, jerkah mereka dan ckp "ampa taktau apa erti cinta"

7. The blackmailing paradigm

Ugut orang-orang yang menyakitkan anda; ex-boyfriend, ex-employer, ex-husband, etc. Jika mereka mendakwa anda di mahkamah, jangan lawyered up, instead represent diri sendiri. That way, orang yang mendakwa anda atau orang yang hendak anda raih simpati akan lebih bersimpati dengan ada. Bersalah atau tak bersalah, belakang kira.

8. Suicidal.

Telan racun tikus. Cut yourself. Whatever. But be sure the damage is not enough to kill yourself. Because if you're dead, it defeats the purpose of gaining sympathy. Nak lagi sambutan, post kat facebook. Gunakan catchphrase yang best-best. Mcm 'malam ini, kul 8.30. selamat tinggal dunia' pasti akan mendapat banyak komen (dan banyak like jika ramai orang yang tak suka anda).

Disclaimer: This post is nonsense. You'd be stupid if you follow any of these.

Udang Lipan

Just came back from Pulau Aman. Didn't enjoy the trip much, since someone tu asyik seasick, and another someone tu pulak is paranoid wanting to get home early, scared that tsunami will hit the island. But look at what we got from Pulau Aman:

Fire up the barbecue boys. We have license to kill grill :-)

Good Friday

If you're going through a bad break up, or if your relationship with someone did not develop into something that you hope for, how long is your 'mourning period'? And by mourning period I mean the period where you're still sad, you cant seem to get over him/her, let alone to move on with your life to find somebody new. Some people say it's half the length of the relationship. e.g: If the relationship took 1 year, mourning period should be 6 months. Some say it's the same as the period of relationship. e.g: If relationship took 1 year, mourning period should be 1 year too. And there are also people who claimed that mourning period should be longer than that.

But according to standard norm, the longer it is the better. Because the sooner you move on with your life, other people would perceive you as the bad guy/girl. And the longer it takes for you to mourn, people would think that you're such a keeper. That you were the better significant half compared to your ex. They would go "Ohhh, honeyy.." and loads of other sympathy gesture because apparently you were sincere, committed and loyal. I dont blame the society. It's the norm and that's how majorities think. I myself experienced the same thing last year. This (ex) significant half of mine were disappointed that I moved on too fast and questioned my sincerity.

Well for starters, I don't believe in this mourning period thingy. Here's why. Just bear with me while I explain. First let us start with the love cycle. Like everything else, love has it's own cycle too. Nine stages to be exact. You can google it or read about it. But basically in order to simplify, it goes like this.

Stage 1: Boy fall in love.

Stage 2: Boy/Girl or both fall out of love.

Stage 3: Boy broke up.

Stage 4: Boy is sad.

Stage 5: Boy sort out his life. Concentrate maybe on work or studies.

Stage 6: Boy gets bored and lonely.

Stage 7: Back to stage 1.

So that pretty much sums it up. There's no beginning. And no ending. Just things you repeatedly do over and over again. Okay now the cycle is done. Another topic pulak: Baggage. This you can google up yourself too. But basically in definition it means painful memories, mistrust, and hurt carried around from the past sexual or emotional meltdown. A plain example of a baggage: You do not want to be involve with someone from the health and medical industry because your ex was in that line before.

Okay now that we're cleared up with both topics, now the reasoning. Im done with the cycle. There's no point crying over spilled milk. You tried one thing and it didn't worked out, so you move on. Find things that work for you. But how are you going to achieve that if you sit around wallowing over something that had happened? Dont cry because it's over, instead smile because it happened. And yeah, Im also done with this emotional baggage thingy. I carried baggage for almost two years and finally I realized how much it burdened me. How it ruined me. How unnecessary it was. Hey, everything was going down the drain, might as well threw these baggage together with it. So when things didn't worked out, I simply started a clean slate.

Start anew. That way you'd be happier. You'd get to know people easier because that doubts, judgement and stereotype of yours is gone. And the sooner you do that, you'd knew that you're one step closer in finding the right one. Yeah it hurts at first. Recognized that you're in pain. Feel the pain. But it should'nt take long. Because sooner or later you'll be back at stage 1. Okay, Im not saying that you should whore yourself up. Seeing people right away. Give your phone number to strangers etc. Not to that extend. Just have the mentaliy "kalau ada buat lagu ada, kalau takdak buat la lagu takdak. Ok cun.

Perisai Raja-Raja

Taken from today's utusan. Congrats on becoming the man of the match. And good luck for today's semi. Go Selangor-UKM! Go Adam koko'ot since you went rogue playing for another state, traitor. haha. All the best. And you better get rid of your pre-game jitters quickly so you can pwn them Kedahan.

Saya budak baik

I don't like to deprecate people, but i'll give you one when it's due. And when that happens, it'll get ugly. Because I will shove your ego right into your candy asses.. So right now I have a bone to pick with you. Please ffs, don't act like you know everything. Just because you read some books, or some articles in the net you think that you know it all. Clearly you dont read enough. Or experience enough. You see, I can tolerate Mr. Know-It-All attitude, but I cant tolerate your I'm-always-right attitude.

Ffs, Bayern Munich had already won the Champions League four times. More than your bloody Barcelona whom to date, only had won three times. Dont get me wrong, I love the current Barca team but have some respect to other teams as well. Bayern in their good ol days can surely make the current Barca team eat dust. For being such an arrogant kiasu and dissing other people's team, you clearly need a history lesson. And yeah Maxwell is a Brazilian, how the eff you said that he's Argentinian? Kata minat Barca. Stupid Poser.

And I hate it when you're trying to prove a point in an argument. Nasi ayam misai tak sedap sebab nasi ayam dia tak sedap. Arsenal bodoh sebab Arsenal bodoh. Lead guitarist is always better than the rhythm guitarist. Wtf, do u know that playing lead does not necessary mean that he's a better guitarist? Sometime the dividing duties of who's playing lead or rhythm is not necessarily for reasons of musical talent, but because the rhythm guitarist is the principle songwriter. As in the case of Tom Petty and Metallica. We are all grown up, if you cant provide facts or reasoning you're only making yourself look stupid. Stupid.

We can talk about almost everything, we're up for any discussion and debate. You can correct me if Im wrong and I can correct you if you're wrong. But oh i forgot. You're always right. But it's funny the other day when you tried to pronounce the word 'beetle' but instead u pronounce the word 'battle'. Apa battle2? Nak lawan digimon ka? Pfftt. And ouh get your fact straight. Kaspersky is pronounced 'kaspers-ki' not 'kasper-sky'. Ni la masalah orang yang banyak sangat baca buku. Dia ingat langit sky in english. You should watch some tv brother.

Ambik ang Jackie Chan ought to teach you some lesson. Eugene Kaspersky is a russian's name. Not an english name. Pfftt. Okay sekarang ni macam aku pulak Mr-Know-It-All. But, I listened to others and I realized that sometimes I could be wrong. That's what makes us different. It's not about who's right or wrong. Or who's clever and who's not. Its about humility, humbleness and friendship. Yea sure losing a few friends on facebook is okay to you, but try losing friends in rl. It just a a matter of time before you'd be watching football at home....alone. Ok cun.

P.s: speaking of russia, I realized this blog has quite a steady visitor from russia. Welcome, silent reader!...or spam bot!...or some phedo stalking for cute boi like me..

Never Say Never

Urgh I dunno why but it seems like this week has been quite a nostalgic week for me. I think I know why. That visit from an old friend really got to me. So i took the liberty to walk down the memory lane, trying to remember a few things from the past. And then I stumbled upon this song:

Verse 1
Some things we don't talk about
better do without
just hold a smile
we're falling in and out of love
the same damn problem
together all the while

Chorus: you can never say never
why we don't know when
time and time again
younger now then we were before
don't let me go (6x)

Verse 2
picture, you're the queen of everything
as far as the eye can see
under your command
i will be your guardian
when all is crumbling
steady your hand
Repeat Chorus.

Bridge
we're falling apart
and coming together again and again
we're coming apart
but we pull it together
pull it together, together again

This song was distributed on July 2008 as The Fray's second single and I listened to it right away. And if you have followed this blog for quite some time, you'd know what happened in July 2008 kan? I was experiencing my first major break up and technically this song was my official break up song. I dont know, but this song has been so deep and sad, i cant afford to hear it much.

Verse 1

It pretty sums up everything that you knew about. Holding on when things get tough and never letting go no matter what happen. There are some things that you avoid acknowledging, no matter how it was there; because life would be easier without those. No matter how it's there, you just ignored it and 'just hold the smile'. There are days when you fought, and days when you don't. Love, hate, sad, happy all at the same time.

Some days you're happy, and others..not so much, but you keep coming back because you conceded that this was how it was supposed to be. You cant help feeling like that. You keep insisting to her that you can "never say never" when you don't know what might happen in the future, and that things seem confusing, and you feel less mature than you were before. And those quiet times when you spend alone, this is what you'll be singing to her. Don't let me go... And suddenly, she's gone.

Verse 2

You're telling her now that she can be happy, and do what she wants. She can be the "Queen of everything", but you'll always be there for her, just like you're her best friend. And when she's having a rough day, you're by her side, no matter what, no matter how badly she hurts you. And you're begging her, don't let me go, don't let me go, don't let me go-o-o.

Bridge

You don't know what's happening. You're getting closer every day, and then, it seems to rip apart. You get close again, and you're pulled apart again. It seems that life just can't make up it's mind on what to do with you. For now, you've given up, and you're just begging, "Please, baby, don't let me go..."

Putra Azmil

Actually, this is just a simple announcement. But since I'm in a buoyant mood to blog, I'd like to announce it in a story mode. But let's backed up a little. Remember this? The post writing about a friend who went rogue, the one that pulled the 'trigger'? Okay now we may begin. One day on January 12th, Ijoi added me on fb. But faruk quickly pointed out to me that he's hardly on, that I need to add his wifey to get updates from that son of a gun.

Faruk was right. Ijoy rarely updates, because he's too busy playing his games. Such an addict, if you see his wall you can only see game request rather than comments or status updates. To the extend:

Tedia. Sampai bini marah. haha. I rofl when I read this. Tapi Ijoy memang suka main game-game camni. Dulu time kat hostel and kat Putat, he'd spent hours main game bodo-bodo kat Metacafe. Paling aku ingat sekali game 'Raja Dadah', where you need to make profit selling drugs based on economics demand and supply. Anyway, what Im trying to say is I hardly heard from the brat. Until la last week when:

I didnt give it much thought when faruk mentioned the 'anak' thingy since as far as I could remember, Ijoy told me that he's planning. And during his visit in Penang pun, he didnt say much about Ijoi. Until la today when I read the wifey's status:

You stud, you becoming a father! Dah rezeki. Plan2 pun dapat. This may comes a bit late, but congratulations ijoy.Hopefully delivery goes well. Pasni takleh main game lama2 dah. haha. And sorry for being such an ignorant. Ang bukannya nak update fb, kheja main game ja. hahaha. clearly I need to add the wifey.

P.s:- wife added

P.s.s:- any thoughts on the name? How about Putra Azmil zukilefeli? (bukan zulkifli ya)

the awakening

Faruk came by to visit last Wednesday after almost 10 months since the last time we hung out. Kalau dah 10 months, that means Ijoi's marriage is nearing it's one year anniversary. Kudos Ijoi. As always, we caught up stories updating whats new with our life. It always amazed me how we could, you know, just 'hit it off' even after quite some time being apart. There's no awkwardness, no uncomfortable chat, no pretentious drama. We just picked where we left off, as if we were never apart. As if nothing has changed.

We also made time to play futsal with my friends. And boy, he's more of a complete player now. I mean, I have always regard him as a top player but a few years ago, he was only a rough diamond. And now he has turned into a polished, shiny gem. During his visit he also managed to get to know Naqi and Nabil. Good God, the siblings were revealing my stories; embarrassing ones to him. After listening to them, Faruk ripped me off, hard. Celaka faruk. Celaka the MNR sibling.

But being ripped off and having banters thrown at me had made me realize how much I miss the good old days. People hardly ripped me off here in Penang. Maybe because most of my friends are younger so they hesitated to do so. I also realized that I have come a long way to be where am I right now. I have changed. We all do. There are dreams that I have given up, and there are new dreams that I wanted to pursue. So did Faruk. He finally wanted to settle down, and he had also decided to resume the family business.

We have taken a different path. We have changed. Papaq is trying to get himself to study in the US, Pakwan is now a Forex trader, Kuga is now interested in politics (haha), and Faruk finally wants a committed relationship. But one thing will remain unchange; the bond and the memories that we have. We would still remember how Faruk and I got robbed. We would still remember Papaq's offside trap. We would still remember the day Kuga accidentally ate beef. And we would still remember Pak Wan's cooking. Wherever, whenever, we could just picked where we left off. Like a long lost brothers.

IOU

I use a lot of abbreviations/internet slang when I am chatting or texting. It makes my life easier that way. I dont have to type long words and I can deliver the message quickly. However, not all people know these abbreviations I've been using and I have to take some time explaining to them. In the end, the time that I expected to save was spent explaining to them, thus defeating the purpose of abbreviations: to save time. Once, i texted a girl 'lol' and she thought it means 'lots of love'. lol. I had a hard time explaining to her. Well here are some of the most frequent abbreviations used by me:

LOL - laugh out loud

LMAO - laughing my ass off

ROFL - rolling on the floor laughing

ROFLMAO - rolling on the floor laughing my ass off

SNAFU - situation normal, all f***ed up

TBH - to be honest

IMO - in my opinion

IMHO - in my humble opinion

TTML - talk to me later.

TTYL - talk to you later

GG - good game

YALLA - hurry up in arabic (picked it up when I was in mmu)

FFS - for f*** sake

ETA - estimated time of arrival

FTW - for the win

IDK - i dont know

vroom vroom - racist son of a gun

fap fap - masturbating

noob - newbie, but meant in an offensive way.

troll - the act of spamming unnecessary stuff in forums, fb walls etc

there's plenty more. will update if i can think of any.

Sherlock Holmes

Contrary to popular believe, Im not arrogant. I can easily admit defeat, and I can easily admit it if I were wrong. All you got to do is prove that I'm wrong. Easy. Like I said in my post earlier, I am a man of logic and a man of facts. I'll state my case and you state yours and we'll decide who is right. But nowadays I hardly found anybody worth an argument. It's either their argument was too weak or I hardly put a foot wrong. Hmm..

The reason why I need proven points is because if I were to apologize or if I were expecting an apology from someone, it's better damn worth it. You cannot tell me, "hey, you're wrong" and expect me to apologize right away. I need to listen first. Tell me what did I do wrong? Why did I do wrong? So that I can learn to be a better man or so that I can counter your ridiculous, absurd ideas to the ground.

And please, try not to lie with tons of bullshit because I can see through it. I'm too clever for most people to lie to. A lot of people can testify to this. Lying to me is like insulting my intelligence. The moment you lied is the moment I've lost my respect towards you. So tread lightly. Even if you managed to slip past me with a lie to get my apology, dont be so happy. Eventually the truth will prevail.

Like recently. For a while, I thought I was at fault. I thought I was wrong and I apologized regrettably. But it turned out that all this while, I was right after all. Thank you. You just fed my ego bigger. Wow. The same song, really? do you really have to be so shallow? You've not just lose my respect, but you've lost your credibility too. Pathetic, it is. You're dead to me. And as for my apologies, I take them back. ok cun